although, we live in the same house
we are not really in the same home
I live in this harsh physical reality
while you live in some world of your own
will I miss your smoking and the gambling debts
when one sad day I find that you are actually gone?
or will I finally be the lucky one
and be the first to move on?
will I remember the far distant good times?
the time before, when we were as close as one
when we were young and in our world full of promise
back when this now fractured family first begun
long years of separation has left me wondering
how I will respond to the approaching inevitable
will love return and break this old shriveled weary heart
or will the years have left me safe and impenetrable?