soap opera joe

Little Professor

Little Professor (Photo credit: unloveablesteve)

good Rockwell calculator joe
says “hey I guess it’s time to go”
Joe wants to go out and see
the pretty miss calculator T.I. 33

poor miss calculator T.I. 33 cries
as she flashes her LEDs and lies
“sorry Joe, but I can’t get out and go
for tonight my batteries are so low”

miss calculator T.I. 33 has flipped her silicon chips
for the big iron of IBM System/360 and all his MIPS
but being the snobbish mainframe computer that he is
he will ignore her for a Data General minicomputer named Liz

meanwhile, poor old calculator Joe
tried to kill himself in the freezing cold snow
but his foolish effort was a total failure
and his owner locked him away in a bottom desk drawer


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  1. #1 by RKHouse on November 11, 2012 - 8:49 pm

    I wrote a couple of these “calculator” poems back in High School. I suspect only the people that lived through those years would understand how amazing things like calculators and digital watches were to us at the time. I never felt the same about my slide rule. πŸ™‚

  2. #2 by emmylgant on November 12, 2012 - 8:57 am

    Ahh! but the wonder of the slide rule for the unintiated was (and still is to me) akin to the secrets of alchemy. Mysterious and awe-inspiring. My dad used one that rested in a well worn leather case when not in plain sight on his draft table.
    Love this poem! Funny while describing our hunger for new toys.

    • #3 by RKHouse on November 12, 2012 - 9:13 am

      LOL, you are right the slide rule was an amazing tool, and so few really knew how to use it. Ah the memories. πŸ™‚

  3. #4 by bellesogni on November 13, 2012 - 5:55 am

    The secret life of calculators. Who knew?

    • #5 by RKHouse on November 13, 2012 - 11:20 am

      LOL, I like that, I should write another calculator poem with “The secret life of calculators” as the title.

      My dad gave me my first calculator in High School. It was a Rockwell 63R (aka Scientific Slide Rule) with beautiful blue digital display. I really loved that calculator, so that was the inspiration for me to be Joe. The IBM probably represented some handsome athlete rival at my high school, but I can’t remember who inspired the little TI in this drama. πŸ™‚

  4. #6 by 35andupcynicismonhold on November 15, 2012 - 4:51 am

    ode to the misplaced and forgotten, huh? πŸ˜‰ hello, sir RK…

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